The Day that True Love Lived

Love it, hate it, this Thursday is a day where the subject of ‘love’ will at least cross your mind. Whether you disdain it or celebrate it, I want to talk about it, because February 14th and beyond, it’s vital that we all be able to give and receive the true love of God.

Listening to Kari Jobe’s “You are Good” one day, I got so inspired about God’s love. The song is a simple one, but it describes such profound, deep qualities about our Father God — His kindness that leads, His goodness that draws, His mercy that calls, and His favor that delights. The chorus repeats the simple refrain“You are Good”, taken from Psalm 100:5. The word in the Hebrew from which we translate the word ‘good’ in verse 5 has so much more depth than what we think of when we hear that commonly used term. The Hebrew word means the highest form of good, ‘gracious, joyful, most pleasant, sweet, loving, kind, bountiful.’

Think of those you love most in life — your absolute favorite people. They usually have at least one or two qualities that stand out to you, that make them the person you adore and love so much. Is it because they are funny? Or gentle? Are they honest? Are they selfless, clever, or inspiring?

Now think about our Father God. He’s the one that made your favorite people and all the favorable qualities about them. In fact, He’s the one in whom they originated and were created. The Bible says that every good and perfect gift comes from Him. That means God is every lovable and wonderful virtue in one. In one love. In one heart. In one being. Everything you’ve ever thought was kind, or good, or lovely, or wonderful — it is from and of Him. There is so much of it, in fact, that God has enough to spread around and give to all of human kind past, present, or future, yet there be enough for Him to be more than it all.

Within our Christian faith, we talk a lot about the day that ‘True Love’ died. Phil Wickham has a gorgeous song by that title, and that day is one of which every Christian should remember and meditate. We must also remember that the story does goes on. Past the day when ‘True Love’ (our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ) died, He rose again. He rose again and lived for us.

That wonderful day, when our victory was bought and our price was paid — that day when we became free of everything in our past — was a day when God showed us what true love really was. The day that True Love lived shows us the ultimate depth of that “good” about which we sing. It showed us all the facets of the love of God.

‘Kindness’ saves, ‘gracious’ heals, ‘bountiful’ delivers, ‘goodness’ restores, and ‘love’ brings life.  This is our Father. This is the God in whom any ‘love’ originates from His very core. You will see reflections of it in the world this week, but if it has not God in it, it is only a knock-off of the real thing. When Jesus rose, it shown throughout the ages that God is good. That His mercy is forever.

As you think about whoever your Valentine is or isn’t this week, remember that everything you like about them originates from our Father God, and He is the most wonderful of them all. He should be our ‘favorite,’ our ‘crush’, our ‘Valentine.’ Fall in love with Him today. His goodness, His kindness. Listen to songs that sing about it, and read the Psalms that proclaim it. Let them show you a new side to His love that you’ve never seen before to give you a fresh perspective of His grace.

What is your favorite thing about Him? Tell Him. What is something you like about Him? Sing it. Write to Him a Valentine, even if it is just upon the table of your heart. I guarantee you it will reach His.

Use this Valentine’s Day not how society pressures you to do so, but rather as a wonderful opportunity to show others this ‘good’ God we are talking about. In fact, Romans 2:4 says that it is this very “goodness” that leads men to repentance, which we are all to be leading them toward.

Do you remember in kindergarten, how we brought Valentines to pass out to everyone in class? It was a time to ‘share the love’ with many. One reason why I’m not opposed to this commercial holiday they named after Saint Valentine is because it is still a chance to share with many. We have categorized it into one box of romance, but ‘love’ is so much more than that, just as ‘good’ is. It is a chance to reach out to others with this virtue that comes from God Himself; this virtue that will outlast all other virtues.

Reflect the real deal this week in a society that is confusing it with the copy-cat. This Valentine’s Day, don’t get caught up in who you have to love or who you don’t. Just love the people around you deeply. Then love God even more.

“For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.” -Psalm 100:5

“Beloved, let us love one another. For love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” -1 John 4:7, 8

“You got a problem with that?”

If there is any situation in which you could insert the thoughts and attitudes of the phrase “You got a problem with that?”, and it would fit — you got a problem.

That attitude is ultimately a defensive reaction, and if you could see yourself saying it in the scenario of your current position, then you are probably in need of more examining than anyone else in that scene. It could be that we are more in the wrong than the person or situation at which we are looking.

Our lab, Knightly, is a very kind dog. He loves everyone and everything; but something funny happens to Knightly when he gets scared. He starts growling a fierce-sounding growl, the fur on his neck stands up, and he might even bark, in a different kind of bark than usual. He sounds fierce, but actually, he is scared. Usually, he is even backing into Rob for safety as he growls at an unfamiliar sound he heard outside. He’s defensive.

As much as we try to tell him when everything is ok, or even give him a command to stop, he won’t listen to us. Only until he doesn’t feel threatened anymore will he calm down and respond to us like himself again.

A situation can start out where you have been misunderstood, or someone has done you wrong. You are innocent in the matter! Your reaction to it determines if you stay innocent or not. If you become defensive, it will quickly take you down a road toward bigger issues like being offended or bitter. Defensiveness will cause you to hold a grudge, instead of responding in kindness. Like Knightly, you are protecting your self from being hurt. Unfortunately, as natural as these responses feel, we are not to respond that way. Rather, we are to put on humility, meekness, gentleness, and teachable heart in our response, along with all the fruits of the Spirit. (Colossians 3:12, Galatians 5:22-23)

We’ve all seen that clever prop “D-fence” held up at a ball game (pictured at the top). I recently saw a comical ad making fun of the “D-fence” sign. Endeavoring to point out the uselessness of the sign, it read “Blocks your view. Makes no noise.” As funny as it is, there is truth to that spiritually! Being defensive, especially in your spirit, blocks you from being able to see people and situations clearly. The whole ‘mode’ of defense to which your emotions quickly draw are very useless to you in helping you make good or sound decisions, spiritually or otherwise.

That can come as a shock when you are viewing someone else as the one with the problem. It takes quite a shift to turn around and look at yourself. Great peace can come though, when we yield to the gentle voice of correction from the Holy Spirit in this matter. Proverbs 3:12 AMP says “For whom the Lord loves He corrects, even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights.” Just as a child often has a defensive attitude in receiving correction from a parent — no matter how much he knows they love him — we can also have that same attitude with God as He tries to lovingly instruct us.

In the harmless situations, it is, well, harmless, I suppose; but the purpose of the insignificant situations is to train you for the bigger ones. In important, life-altering situations, this attitude and reaction can be quite detrimental.

The source of it all is our inner man. Our conscience. When it pricks us, deep down and ever-so-lightly, instead of yielding to its guidance, many times we balk up and get defensive. We put other people’s names and other situations on the reason why were are justified in the reaction we have.

One of our favorite television indulgences is the BBC original ‘Downton Abbey.’ The grandmother on the series is one of my favorite characters; she has so many witty lines. In a recent episode, she said one that was more than wit — it was wise! — and it stuck with me. She said “People are never more righteous than when they’re in the wrong.”

People who are in the wrong, especially morally, are usually pretty defensive about it. Many even react by lashing out or pointing fingers at those who are in the right. The voice of immorality in our world is very loud, in fact. Why? At some point when they started down the wrong road, they felt the prick of conscience in their inner man, and chose to rebel against it. But it follows them, and they and their voice get louder as they try to fight it. They are reacting defensively to the still small voice inside. These scriptures in Acts and Ephesians show this to be the case:

“For this people’s heart has grown dull, and with their ears they can barely hear, and their eyes they have closed; lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears and understand with their heart and turn, and I would heal them.” Acts 28:27 ESV 

 “They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart.” Ephesians 4:18 ESV

Another situation in which this can be seen is with relationships — ok, yes, I’m going there! In both friendships and romance, if something is not right, usually the people around you are a good judge of the situation; they can see things honestly and from a place less emotionally attached. So many times, we rebel against their opinion; we defensively react to the deep down scratching we want so badly to ignore. Kenneth E. Hagin called it a feeling of ‘washing your feet with your socks on.’ People make friendships with or date the wrong people all the time, out of pure defensiveness. In fact, some of the worst decisions of our lives can come out of this place.

Are you feeling defensive about anything in your life? No matter what the situation, stop right now and examine yourself. Be true to yourself and honestly look to see if you may be in the wrong. If we make the habit of doing this in even the little things, it will help us be able to see clearly in the most important decisions of life. It may be that you find only small adjustments need to be made; decisions like looking at God instead of man. You may find something bigger that needs addressing — either way, don’t ignore it.

Say instead, as David did “My defense is of God” (Psalm 7:10), and trust God to work together all things for your good (Romans 8:28). Let the Lord be your defense!

“I will sing of your mighty strength and power; yes, I will sing aloud of Your mercy and loving-kindness in the morning; for You have been to me a defense and a refuge in the day of my distress.”

Psalm 59:16 AMP

At the end of Valentine’s Day…

It’s not the beginning of Valentine’s Day that can be the hardest for a ‘single lady’. In one sense, you’ve known the day is coming, and you know what it holds in store. The day can go by in quite a manageable way — especially when receiving the heart-warming messages that may come from family and friends who truly care about and love you.

It is the end of the day for which you have to watch out. The end of the day is when you let your guard down.

The day is done, but your mind is just getting started — it counts up the years of Valentine misfortunes; it tells you how old you are and what you don’t have. It makes what other people have seem so glow-y and sparkly, and compares you to that. This is the lens from which your mind will try to get you to see your life today.

Your mind will never do you justice on Valentine’s Day, if you give it control — single or not! The mind always has a lens through which you are looking at your life. Today, don’t let it control you. Change this lens to one that sees the amazing and epic love that is already yours. This ‘V-Day’, look at your life through God’s lens of love to see all that you do have. “Don’t be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” (Romans 12:2)

Whether you’re single or not, and even if you are married, you’re first love should never be a man. I surely do love my husband with all my heart and to the depths of my soul, but He is not my Savior, and he did not love me first. 1 John 4:19 says “We love Him because He first loved us.” God loved me long before any person could.

Thinking of God’s love for you on Valentine’s Day should never stop. You are not remembering His love for you today because you are single! No! You are viewing life through His lens of love because He is the author of love in your life, and always will be. Think of Him on every Valentine’s Day for all your life.

Talking about you, Jeremiah 31:3 says “I have loved you with an everlasting love…with lovingkindness I have drawn you.” Even in a natural relationship, you have to let yourself be loved. Receive God’s lovingkindness by which He is drawing you today. Let yourself be drawn.

As those thoughts come at the end of the day, turn to the comfort of the Word. Let it wash your soul and mind. Let it change the lens through which you are viewing yourself. As Romans 12:2, above, tells us, only after that renewing of the mind are we able to prove — or even see! — what that perfect will of God is for us. Let these scriptures below remind you of all that is good in your life; let them remind you of His amazing love and faithfulness; and let them remind you of His promise to meet the desires of your heart, and to give to you every good thing.

Then, one day, when you can say “I have found the one whom my soul loves”, your heart can still be anchored in the love of God, from which all human love abounds.

Whether you are ‘single’ or not, this Valentine’s Day or the next, know that you are never alone — not because of the person sitting beside you — but because, as He told Joshua in Chapter 1:5 of that book, God “will never leave you or forsake you.” Your first love will never be the person you exchange cards or share a meal with — It will always, only be Him.

Love Him and receive His love this Valentine’s Day, and it will always be enough.

Scriptures for your heart

Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the Rock and firm Strength of my heart and my Portion forever.”

Isaiah 54:5 (*My favorite ‘Single Ladies’ scripture) “For your Maker is your Husband–the Lord of hosts is His name–and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer”

Jeremiah 31:3 “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with loving-kindness have I drawn you and continued My faithfulness to you”  CEV: “I have loved you with a love that lasts forever.”

James 4:5 “The Spirit Whom He has caused to dwell in us yearns over us and He yearns for the Spirit [to be welcome] with a jealous love”

Psalm 69:16  “Hear and answer me, O Lord, for Your loving-kindness is sweet and comforting; according to Your plenteous tender mercy and steadfast love turn to me.”

Revelation 2:4 NKJV “…you have left your first love”  v5 MSG:”Turn back! Recover your dear early love. No time to waste…”

Revelation 1:5,6 ESV “To Him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by His blood and made us a kingdom, priests to His God and Father, to Him be glory and dominion forever and ever.”

Psalm 37:3-7 “Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land and feed surely on His faithfulness, and truly you shall be fed. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord (roll and repose each care of your load on Him); trust also in Him and He will bring it to pass. And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as the shining sun of the noonday. Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him…”

Joshua 23:14 “Know in all your hearts and in all your souls that not one thing has failed of all the good things which the Lord your God promised concerning you. All have come to pass for you; not one thing of them has failed.”

Psalm 84:11 “For the Lord God is a Sun and Shield; the Lord bestows grace and favor and glory (honor, splendor, and heavenly bliss)! No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”

Colossians 3:2-3  “Set your minds and keep them set on what is above (the higher things), not on the things that are on the earth. For you have died, and your [new, real] life is hidden with Christ in God.”

(All references are in the Amplified version, unless otherwise stated)